"I wrote down this speech that I had no time to practice so this will be the practicing session. Thank you Alfre, for such an amazing, amazing introduction and celebration of my work. And thank you very much for inviting me to be a part of such an extraordinary community. I am surrounded by people who have inspired me, women in particular whose presence on screen made me feel a little more seen and heard and understood. That it is ESSENCE that holds this event celebrating our professional gains of the year is significant, a beauty magazine that recognizes the beauty that we not just possess but also produce.
I want to take this opportunity to talk about beauty, Black beauty, dark beauty. I received a letter from a girl and I’d like to share just a small part of it with you: “Dear Lupita,” it reads, “I think you’re really lucky to be this Black but yet this successful in Hollywood overnight. I was just about to buy Dencia’s Whitenicious cream to lighten my skin when you appeared on the world map and saved me.”
My heart bled a little when I read those words, I could never have guessed that my first job out of school would be so powerful in and of itself and that it would propel me to be such an image of hope in the same way that the women of The Color Purple were to me.
I remember a time when I too felt unbeautiful. I put on the TV and only saw pale skin, I got teased and taunted about my night-shaded skin. And my one prayer to God, the miracle worker, was that I would wake up lighter-skinned. The morning would come and I would be so excited about seeing my new skin that I would refuse to look down at myself until I was in front of a mirror because I wanted to see my fair face first. And every day I experienced the same disappointment of being just as dark as I was the day before. I tried to negotiate with God, I told him I would stop stealing sugar cubes at night if he gave me what I wanted, I would listen to my mother’s every word and never lose my school sweater again if he just made me a little lighter. But I guess God was unimpressed with my bargaining chips because He never listened.
And when I was a teenager my self-hate grew worse, as you can imagine happens with adolescence. My mother reminded me often that she thought that I was beautiful but that was no conservation, she’s my mother, of course she’s supposed to think I am beautiful. And then…Alek Wek. A celebrated model, she was dark as night, she was on all of the runways and in every magazine and everyone was talking about how beautiful she was. Even Oprah called her beautiful and that made it a fact. I couldn’t believe that people were embracing a woman who looked so much like me, as beautiful. My complexion had always been an obstacle to overcome and all of a sudden Oprah was telling me it wasn’t. It was perplexing and I wanted to reject it because I had begun to enjoy the seduction of inadequacy. But a flower couldn’t help but bloom inside of me, when I saw Alek I inadvertently saw a reflection of myself that I could not deny. Now, I had a spring in my step because I felt more seen, more appreciated by the far away gatekeepers of beauty. But around me the preference for my skin prevailed, to the courters that I thought mattered I was still unbeautiful. And my mother again would say to me you can’t eat beauty, it doesn’t feed you and these words plagued and bothered me; I didn’t really understand them until finally I realized that beauty was not a thing that I could acquire or consume, it was something that I just had to be.
And what my mother meant when she said you can’t eat beauty was that you can’t rely on how you look to sustain you. What is fundamentally beautiful is compassion for yourself and for those around you. That kind of beauty enflames the heart and enchants the soul. It is what got Patsey in so much trouble with her master, but it is also what has kept her story alive to this day. We remember the beauty of her spirit even after the beauty of her body has faded away.
And so I hope that my presence on your screens and in the magazines may lead you, young girl, on a similar journey. That you will feel the validation of your external beauty but also get to the deeper business of being beautiful inside.
There is no shame in Black beauty.”
Reading the bold and realizing that that’s a common issue is both cathartic and painful. I spent much of my childhood doing just that and waking up disappointed that I was still black.
Lupita has so much talent, so much influence, so much power and I just want her to win. As black girls, we need her to win. Not just awards, but win at her career. There’s so many black actresses that have moments and not the legacies they deserve. I truly hope the course of Lupita’s career does not follow that path.
Scott McCall probably celebrates every International Women’s Day by bringing his mom cupcakes at the hospital
Your blood is nothing but ferrous liquid. when you bleed, you reek of rust. it is iron that fills your heart and sits in your veins. and what is iron, really, unless it’s forged?
you are iron.
and you are strong.
hi there! how are doing today? sorry about this being so late! you could never bother me; you’re so very sweet, and it’s a good question! there are different branches of feminism, some of which you can find here. for example, white feminism is one toxic branch of feminism that is especially exclusive of poc. a lot of white feminists champion iggy azalea, miley cyrus, and lily allen while ignoring their misogynoir, gross objectification of woc as well as their consistent cultural appropriation + exploitation of poc and poc cultures. i identify as an intersectional feminist because oppressions intersect (for example, i exist at the intersection of racism, because i’m black, misogyny, because i’m a woman, and homophobia, because i’m queer) and can only be solved together since most women experience more than one form of oppression. but, to your question, radical feminism has a habit of stepping on other minorities for the sake of their own causes, which is not unique to that specific branch of feminism as white feminism, liberal feminism, and individual feminists do this as well, to name a few. radfems hide behind the pretense of being ‘radical’ as justification for their rampant transphobia, transmisogyny and exclusion of trans women from feminist spaces. there’s also a lot of sex-shaming/sex-negativity, equating genitalia to gender even after being edit: (changed corrected to called out) called out on their binarist ideals + i’ve seen some radfems villainize multisexual women, especially multisexual trans women, meaning they find that we, multisexual women, somehow ‘betray’ their feminist movement inherently, which is bullshit to the 22nd degree. TERFs (trans exclusive radical feminists)/’trans critical’ radfems = actual trash + here’s another reason radfems aren’t great at all. this was all over the place, but hopefully i helped just a little. feel free to send an ask whenever you have a question and if i feel qualified to speak on the matter, i can help you out, or you can just stop in to say hello! if i’ve misspoken, please feel free to correct me!